Uhg. I think I’m starting to be like Larry, updating my page once a month or something. I think part of it is the fact that I’m really beginning to hate this damn page’s layout and look. Every time I come back, it’s still blue and yellow, and I don’t know enough about PHP to change it. Larry would say “learn it, and then change it”, but it’s just not that easy for me. I know HTML only because I was bored and had time (neither of which apply now) and it’s half English anyway. PHP is too alien, and I just don’t have the drive or the time right now.
Another part of it is that I’ve been just that: too busy. I work about 8-9 hours a day, and I come home tired, and I don’t really have the drive to pour what’s left of me into a blue screen. That, and all I do is work. It’s not like I have a fuckton to write about anyway. Updating takes effort and content, and I don’t seem to have either in abundance.
The vast majority of it is the fact that I feel like I’m a whore for updating. An attention whore, as the title suggests. I check for comments, because it makes me feel special and paid attention to. I update to tell everyone what I’m doing, as if they really care. Heh. I mean, as if you really care, because you all know that this is another update about nothing. I don’t ever write about anything interesting, and I never have anything really witty to say. I don’t comment on the world today, I don’t laugh about things that everyone else could share too. Nope, it’s all about me here. My photos, my art, my wee little life that I feel like someone else should care about too. Shit, I even tell everyone about stupid stuff that no one on earth would write about but me. ::sigh:: So, I’ve been trying to stay away a bit because I feel like I’m whoring myself out for comments. Like I’m just keeping a blog because I think people really care about what I say. Oh, I know, I’m sure I’ll get a bunch of comments back that say “Oh, I love your blog. I read it everyday, because I really do care!”… Heh. But about what? I’m not funny, I’m not cute. I don’t write eloquent posts, and I don’t even write often. What’s here for you to like? My photos never get commented on, or even looked at that often. You people don’t really care about what I do for a living, or how I see the world. Nothing of interest happens to me, and my art’s not even that good (not that you look at it anyway). Let me ask you something very important:
What’s here to keep you coming back?
Should I just give up?
Am I really an attention whore?
For those of you that DO care about my life and photos, I’m fine, my TV keeps turning itself on at night, and I’ve updated the galleries.