WARNING: The post that follows will be very girly!
As far as owies, I’m pretty damn sure that this past 10 days has been the most painful (and cost me the most money in painkillers) than any combined all year. As I wrote previously, I fell down the stairs and bruised my ass, which really hurt. I tell you, it’s sure not something I’d want to do again. Well, five days ago, I snipped the tip (maybe a millimeter of skin, but it hurt like HELL) off of the top of my left index finger while cutting fresh grass for Quigley. The day after that, I fell down the damn stairs AGAIN! Yes, I promise, I’m not that stupid. It’s the slippery shoes I was wearing. Two bruises on my ass now. I was all sore the next day. The next day after being all sore, I started my period! So, we have:
1. Fall down the stairs.
2. Cut the top off of finger.
3. Fall down stairs again.
4. Cramps!
To add to that, I was PMSing like hell for two days, and had a really shitty day at work. Now, add all of that to the normal pain that happens to me everyday (things like paper cuts, banged knees, bunny scratches, headaches, bite my tongue, etc..) and I’ve taken more Aleve this month than all of last year! Before you ask, NO, i did not take photos of my ass.
This also begins the 5 months that I live in fear when I go outside. Why? Bugs that buzz. My patented ‘Flying stingy things’. Bees, wasps, yellow jackets, hornets.. etc. Flies scare the crap out of me, because the buzz too, and even the random butterfly shadow that passes over me before I know what it is will make me flinch and run. It’s totally pathetic. I walk out of the door and scan the ground to pick out my route. I have to plan my route. Otherwise, I might run right into something that flies and has a thorn in it’s ass. I have been stung far too many times to take this lightly. It HURTS! If the unthinkable happens and one of these vile insects gets into my house, I’m reduced to a blathering puddle of girly goo and tears until someone comes and kills it for me. I cannot kill it myself, because I can’t get that close to them without pissing my pants. So I call someone, practically in tears, and plead with them to come over and save me. Until they get here, I crawl around on the floor and watch the thing like an old woman watching a mouse. It’s really sad, and it makes me feel like a total idiot. I hate bugs.