I took a nap for an hour today and had the WEIRDEST dream I’ve had in a while.
I dreamed that I had a baby… and I forgot. Like, for three months. Forgot I was pregnant, forgot I had the baby, everything. Meggie came over and she says “How’s Nitta (Pronounced ‘nee-tah’)?” and I replied “… Uh. I don’t know. Let me go check.” So I go in to see her and there she is, 3 months old or so. Obviously someone was taking care of her, but damned if I know who. So I pick her up and she gives me this “WTF?” look, then she starts crying. Of course. She has no clue who I am! So I give her… (wait for it) some Cheerios, which she snatches up and eats them like she’s starving. I walk back out with her and this stupid expression on my face and tell Meggie “She’s eating Cheerios. I guess I should feed her more often.” to which she replies angrily “Yeah, James (my dad) thinks so too.” I just sat down and thought “I’m a mother. A really BAD one!”
Here’s the final card design. I did a bunch of different fonts and just hated them, so this is it. I taked to Atari (my graphic designer friend who also did my logo) and he said that I should always always use the logo for brand recognition. He made a few other points and overall it looks a load better. These will be printed as magnets so hopefully people will stick them on the fridge (or better, a work fridge) and see them everyday rather than just leaving them somewhere to get lost.
Last night I dreamed Meggie was pregnant and we were trying to work out an overseas trip for me for a while to do maternity and newborn shoots. It was sooo weird. I woke up laughing at the thought of her pregant because she’s such a career girl. She’d be so mad because a pregnancy/baby would seriously slow her down.
December 19: I am very glad that 2007 is finally rolling around and I can start using my awesome appointment book. It rocks.
December 20: I am glad that I can ask a question (cards) and get a shitload of answers.
December 21: I am thankful for John’s family. They think highly enough of me to send ME a check with his for Christmas. That’s never happened to me before.
I just woke up from a nasty nap. I dreamed that John and I were living in this huge house near a forest. The big trees pretty much came right to the huge glass windows that covered the entire side of one wall in the room we were in. We were watching somehting on TV then a really really (read: horse-sized) big lion jumped out of the trees outside and began pacing back and forth on a little sitting-sill outside the glass. Naturally, I got my camera and shot a few (non-flash) photos. John was watching me somewhat bemusedly. Suddenly, it reared up on hind legs and proceded to claw at the glass, obviously wanting inside so it could get us. I saw it’s elbow crack the glass, so I gasped and yelled “The glass broke! RUN!” before running out of the room. I was aware that running would just make it’s prey drive stronger, so i ran into the nearest room I could find with a wooden door: the bathroom. As I fumbled the phone out of my pocket to call 911, I opened the door a crack to check on it and saw that it had John’s shoe in it’s mouth. Looking around for John, I was horrified to see that he’d been knocked behind the sofa. It was like one of those family films where they show that someone’s hurt or dead by placing them behind something and showing only a body part, motionless. That’s what I saw. John’s feet, motionless. The rest of his body unseeen behind the couch. I woke up, breathing really hard and near tears. Yikes!
Last night’s dream was rather upsetting, in a funny way. First, John decided to leave me. Not for Larken, but her husband, Blixem. I was all sad and crying, and Blixem says “Heart of my heart!” and runs off with John, leaving both Larkenand I all sad and crying. Then from somewhere I have wings (surprise), so i’m flying around and crying, then John shows up and says “I love you, but my mother just died!” So he’s crying now, and I cry some more too. Then BrianL (John’s brother) shows up crying about his mom being dead… more crying.. etc.
This time, I dreamed about a winter Anna’s hummingbird instead. Stupid girl.
I dreamed last night that i was on a bus full of my kids. My ’students’, that is. Some psycho crazy woman had hijacked the bus and was driving us around town to take us somewhere and presumably kill us all or something. One of the brave kids (who surprisingly is one of the more insecure kids in real life) gets up an climbs out a window as the bus is rocketing by some bushes. The crazy driver sees him, and shimmies the bus so he falls out onto the road and not the bushes. He dissapears, but I jump up and yell “You heartless BITCH! That was a child!” and I stumble up to the front of the bus. I then procede to bite her to surrendering. As in, little bloody chunks out of her fingers and arms, which I spit back out in her face. I woke up thinking “Eeew!”.
For the second night in a row, I woke up from a dream in which a Rufous Hummingbird was at one of my feeders. I’ve never had a winter hummingbird before, so this is pretty big stuff. A bander would come out and everything.. etc. I keep imagining my sugar water levels in the feeders are going down too, which totally doesn’t help. I’m such a dork.
Last night I dreamed that I was at work (note: I have never dreamed of a place I’ve ever actually been, so when I say ‘work’, what I mean is a place that my head recognized as ‘work’ but looks nothing like anywhere I’ve ever been). A lady came in with a small package of something, and asked me if I could keep an eye on it. I said sure, and she left. I ignore it for a while, and she comes back. She says that I’ve done such a good job watching it for her that she’ll let me fly with her for a while. Naturally, I’m thrilled. She hold out her hand to me, and we just fly off, like Superman and Lois Lane or something. Just flying through the air. She lands and takes a bit of the stuff in the box (it’s a powder) and throws it on me. It’s flying dust (Peter Pan anyone?), and I can fly by myself! I zoom around the sky for hours and it’s wonderful. I land and go back to work, hoping that the dust will last long enough to do it again. One of my co-workers decides to steal the box of powder, so I run after her to head her off, knowing that if she takes it, I’ll never fly again. I get there just in time, and I decide to steal the powder for myself (Meggie, where were you in this dream? You always stop me from doing bad things!). I need some magic to make it permanant, so I steal that too (WTF?). It’ll take a while to process, so I head back to work, content in the knowledge that I’ve foiled a would-be thief and I’ll be able to fly for the rest for my life. While I’m busy being happy, my boss comes in and tells me about the stolen powder. I pretend to be surprised and outraged. She asks to shake my hand, then says my handshake is nervous and unnatural (yeah, huh?). She asks me again about the powder, and I lie again (though I almost told the truth). Just as the magic is ready, the police come and handcuff me for stealing!
This is where I woke up, sweating like a pig (wait, pigs don’t sweat!) and scared out of my mind that I was being hauled to jail and I’d never fly again. Once I calmed down enough to realize that I wasn’t going to jail, it hits me that I’ll actualy never actually fly.. ever. *sigh* I hate mornings like that. I always just want to cry myself back to sleep. Though, being able to fly would be worth stealing just about anything. Too bad it’s not that easy.
Last night I dreamed I saw a Rufous Hummingbird at my feeders. I was so excited to get my camera that I woke myself up. Nerg.
I normally don’t have bad dreams, but I had a whopper last night. I dreamed that I was at home, and a bunch of big black guys in black shirts came to get me. Not rape me or anything, just collect me and everyone else around. They were herding all of us into bars and nightclubs and large areas, because there was something coming. Well, it turns out that instead of herding us out of danger, they were purposefully herding us into it, into the places that would be hit first. I was watching out the window, looking to the sky, when I saw the first rockets. They were shuttle-type crafts, thousands of them. I knew they had people on them, people that were going to be safe, but the rockets started dropping bombs on everyone else. Bombs everywhere, people running all over the place. I ran right into Larken, Blixem, Munchie and Benji. She yelled “We have to make it to the train station! It’s our last chance south before nuclear winter!” I couldn’t find John and I was torn, but I told her I’d go with them to the train station in case he was there. The bad guys were waiting on us, so we got together with a lot of people and rushed the train station. It was a pretty train station, lots of people behind the counters, lots of maps and pretty things to look at. Just as we were getting there, it got very hot. I put my hand out to the door, and felt it rumble, but I was so scared of what had happened that I went in anyway, no matter what. As soon as the doors opened, I saw this haze of dust and people. Lots of dead people, no train station anymore. I looked around for John, but all I saw was a little girl in a green jumper dress holding a dead man’s hand. She was screaming “Daddy! NO!
This is the point that I wake up. I’ve had the dream once before but didn’t remember. I’ve seen that screaming child and her blown up daddy before, and this time I couldn’t forget it and go back to sleep. It wasn’t so bad when I was IN the dream, but now that I was awake enough to think about what I would do if any of that really happened, it was awful. The way I saw it, I had four choices. I could either wait for John and leave with him when he came back, I could wait for John and die here because he was already dead, I could go with Larken and find John there, or I could go with Larken and live the rest of my life knowing John was dead and I left him. I started trying to figure out what I would do, where I would go to look for him, what I would pack if I needed to leave alone.. etc. I’m not sure I could leave here without him. I might stay and hope for his return, but if he didn’t come, would I have the guts to leave alone and survive? Or would I chicken out and stay in my comfy home as long as possible until the power went out and I froze or starved?
I wandered into the kitchen and cried all over poor John for a while. I described the dream and how I felt, and my four choices. I think I made him cry a bit too, but I’m not sure of the reason. I also just couldn’t help looking outside to see if there were any bad men or rockets with bombs.
